How To Get Your Life When You Feel Lost

I’m been away from my blogging safe haven for a while and during that time I had a breakdown, an epiphany, felt lost and confused .. and ultimately got back up and began to re-find myself.

I. Am. Still. Trying. To. Figure. It. Out.

Everyday is a challenge.

No, seriously.

A multitude of things has happened during my time away from my blogging safe haven. I am finishing up the final touches of redecorating my room. My heart was broken. I booked a vacation rental to Costa Rica for my 23rd birthday. My heart was broken again lol. I lost my voice. I stopped writing. I began to feel very uninspired. I re-found my voice. I wrote. A lot. I realigned my goals. My laptop broke – which ultimately stopped me from blogging to you all about all the things that I’ve been dealing with. I got a new laptop. I started to revisit the world of dating -yass honey! I started my natural body butters. I’ve been learning and experimenting with new jewelry designs and finding ways to better myself and my craft. I tried being vegan for a week. I realized that I can only be vegan for a week and the pescatarian lifestyle is for me lol. I also realized that my working environment isn’t one that makes me happy. Realized that a part of the reason that it is so hard to steadily be happy and journey on towards peace is because I am surrounded by more negative things, people and places than I thought. I realized that I need to separate myself from those things now more than ever for the sake of my mental health, clarity and continuous path to self love. Oh, I need a new job guys. This is FACTS. I’m actively looking. However, I also realized that my true goal is to work for myself. Aside from that, I also had to remind myself that even during my times of doubt and frustration that I am an extraordinary, exceptional, brilliant and beautiful human being. So for the time I was away ….. I laughed, I cried, I learned … and realized that I am a confused, beautiful but … seriously a confused mess and I need to get my life.

Yes, you read that long ass paragraph only for it to end with “I’m confused”. I am lost in translation. Swept up in thoughts of how to make myself a better person than I was yesterday and caught between making those around me happy, helping out where I can and perfecting my craft and writing and re-finding my voice and just wanting some plain old love and attention!

If the title has compelled you to read this then you’re probably waiting for the part where I give a list of proper advice about how to get ya life! Listen, this is one time where I am just as lost as you. No proper advice over here just the beginning phases of life getting that I went through, lol.


During my time away I learned that the best way to start is to identify the problem. The source of stress. Source of sadness, hindrance, confusion etc. For me, that was identifying that I felt stuck, stagnant and complacent.

Then I stopped in my tracks and thought about why I felt this way. I’ve been out of college for over a year now. I don’t have a job in my field. I gave up a year of my life to help out someone who doesn’t seem to appreciate it. My business has been open for a year and I feel like it should be bigger than it is (while I do know these things take patience, time, hard work and dedication). A relationship that I thought was going to flourish in every sense of the word … failed. I couldn’t hold on to money. Felt like important people in my life weren’t matching the effort in which I give them (this still holds true but this is for another post lol). Oh man, and so much more.

I cried. Then I cried some more. I let out a rage of emotions.

Then I snapped out of it.

If you are a frequent reader of my blog, it won’t surprise you that I then made a list.

I made a list of goals. Then I prioritized them. Then I made a list of how to accomplish them. I made a list of my feelings. Then I made a list of how to work through each one.

I consoled myself. Because at 2 a.m when you feel like the world is crashing down on you and there’s no one you can call .. you’re all you have. And even when you feel like you deserve more than that or you don’t feel like that’s not enough … YOU HAVE TO BE ENOUGH FOR YOU. No matter what.

I revisited yoga and different breathing practices. Because during this time, I stopped and I could feel the tension rising within me.

I prayed. I’m not religious in any sense of the word but I believe in a higher power and I find solace in talking to that being.

I woke up one morning and I decided that I could no longer let my feelings of complacency stop me from being motivated and taking charge of my life.

I woke up that same morning grateful that I have been given another chance to make things right & to be my best self.

I applied to jobs. I read a little. Put on a face mask. Laughed. Facetimed bae and told myself that the following days would be different.

I spoke my goals into existence and I have been doing it since that morning.

Then I smiled because the only place to go from here is up. There will be a few more bad patches along the way -I know. There will be more times, when I’m feeling less grateful and less blissful, more discouraged, more frustrated but I know that I will overcome it. As I stated before, I am an extraordinary, beautiful, intelligent, confused mess and I realized if it wasn’t so, I wouldn’t be me and I couldn’t and wouldn’t have it any other way.

& CHECK .. there you have it, in the midst of all things confusing, ya girl has begun to get her life.

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Daily Reminder #2

“It WILL get worse before it gets better and when better comes it’s gonna feel so damn good”.signature.jpgKeep up with me:
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Daily Reminder #1

I must be dragged through mud before I see my flower bloom.

I got this 👌🏾


So I’m starting this little thing, lol. I don’t know what to call it yet. But in light of all the negativity that has been surrounding us lately, I think it’s important to constantly surround ourselves with positive words, thoughts and people.

I was having a rough day, a few days ago. I had to gather myself and in doing so I told myself “I must be dragged through mud before I see my flower bloom.” I don’t know why those words came to me the way that they did. But they did. It came, formulated in my heart and mind at the perfect time. Then I realized, I got this. I am an amazing and powerful, authentically beautiful female. There will be more hardships to come but through those strenuous times, I will prevail. ❤

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Along My Spiritual Journey: The Beginning

A few months before my 21st birthday I think I had an epiphany. I kind of fell … into myself. Let me explain.

I have always felt like the odd one out. Externally, I was happy and just like everyone else. Internally, I knew I was different. I pretended to enjoy the same things that everyone else did. I pretended that my beliefs were the same as theirs. I pretended that I cared about the same things. I knew I didn’t but externally it made me fit right in. So much so, that in high school it became me … or rather I became it. I became the girl that cared about drama. I became the girl that was hard on the exterior. I became the girl that didn’t take any shit. I became the beauty queen that everyone desired to be. The alpha female. Externally.

Internally, I was fighting. With myself. With what others would think of me. You see, when I was living in Boston .. although I pretended and I kind of fit, I never felt comfortable. It never felt like home. But when I moved back to New York, my pretending got me accepted. The boy I liked, liked me back. I mean he worshiped the ground I walked on. I made friends instantly .. and we clicked just the same. My home life wasn’t the best (I resented my family a lot because they continued their life in New York while I had to start over in another state … but that’s another story lol) but I was healthy and happy .. externally.

Internally, I still felt different. Awkward. Always trying to find the right thing to say. Although everyone thought I had it all figured out. So I went along with it. Up until the last day of high school. Good riddens, except for a few close friends I left high school and my pretend games behind. Or so I thought.

When I got to college, I was ecstatic. I felt like a new chapter had begun. Until one piece of high school followed me to college. She didn’t know me all too well, but we had the same group of friends .. and she felt safe, so we clung to each other. I could tell that she was playing a pretend game too, although we never spoke about it. Together along with some other friends we met, we became the cool freshmans. But we, us two stood out. For different reasons, and this story isn’t about her sooooo yea lol. I stood out for those same reason as I did in high school. I became one of the popular girls. In my group, I was considered the outspoken one, the one that people went to, the one that everyone wanted but couldn’t get, the one that couldn’t be figured out but had the answers, the plans. I was once again an alpha female.

I won’t lie. While in college, I did enjoy my pretend game. I felt on top of the world. And I had my group of best friends that I could turn to. To release the real me … at a bare minimum. Until a bare minimum with 5 or 6 girls wasn’t enough. I got tired of being sheltered. Sheltering myself and who I really was. I began to hate myself again. The fight and anger brewing inside of my yet again. External vs internal. Who I want to be vs Who I am. Ah.

The transition from sophomore year to junior year was the hardest and most fulfilling. Don’t worry, I’ll tell you why. Lol.

Sophomore year, I lost a good friend (yes, it was the girl from the previous paragraph). See, her game of pretending ended .. quite abruptly. Then she transferred schools. But, like I said this story isn’t about her lol. After losing her, I began to reevaluate things that were important to me. Over time, my views on things began to change. And I voiced them. I no longer stated what people wanted to hear. I stated what was from my heart .. as cheesy as that sounds. Buttttttttttt, something was still, I don’t know .. blocking me? Maybe it was me blocking me because I was so used to hiding the bitter parts of myself.

Well anyways, I continue to struggle internally and I think externally it began to show. I distanced myself from my loved ones, buried my head in books and work and went on a small hiatus. Then things went left. On my haitus, I fell off. I didn’t care about anything and fell into a spell of depression. And I mean things really did go LEFT. Everything that could go wrong .. was going wrong. Love life – wrong. Friendships – wrong. Work – I got fired so yea wrong. School – WRONG.

This is going to sound so cheesy and cliche and every word that is synonymous with cliche … but then I had a terrible hair mishap. Bare with me readers, lol. This hair mishap resulted in me having to cut my hair (something that I wanted to do for a while but was too afraid to do). Let. Me. Tell. You. I had never felt so free. The day I cut my hair was the day I got fired. I had cried on the way to my moms friends apartment but when I got there I was at ease. I guess I knew a change was coming lol. I told everyone that I got fired and they gasped. I remember giggling and although I felt terrible, saying “It’s okay, everything happens for a reason”. He told me to prepare myself and I sat in this little chair while he gathered his equipment. I vividly remember the buzzing sound as he turned the clippers on. I was scared as hell! And as he took this razor to my head, I began to shed so many fucking tears it was unbelievable. I just cried. It felt so good. Like years and years of fake, bullshit, sucky moments were being washed away. Oh my goodness. I remember when he was done, I let out this huge sigh, I wiped my eyes and he gave me a mirror. I was afraid to look, but everyone in the house was cheering me on and making me feel so pretty and awesome lol. I looked in the mirror, smiled and cried all over again because I truly did feel free in that very moment

That exact moment was when I think I had the epiphany.

The next week at school, listen honey… I slayed. It was the last week of junior year but I still felt on top of the world. I carried that same attitude through summer vacation and back again into my senior year. Oh man, senior year (once again, that’s another story lol).

The beginning of senior year was met with so much positive vibes and good energy. The start of my spiritual journey had begun. I said what I wanted. Dressed the way I wanted. Felt the way I wanted and without apologizes.
This time around, I was still outspoken but in the most genuine and authentic way. Like, I am cheesing as I write this. That is how amazing it felt. I was still a reliable source for people, I was still dependable, tactful, charming and beautiful and people saw that. I was still an alpha female, but in a more positive and luminescent way. As a matter of fact more people gravitated towards me and the energy that I gave off. Was I still guarded? Of course. It was just the beginning. But opening up myself to receive the energy of other amazing and positive people was something I had never felt before and it was invigorating. I was satisfied externally and internally for the first time in what felt like forever.

I remember a friend of mine, Brian pulled me aside and he said to me “I see a change in you from the girl you were when I first met you and the woman you are now. I love it. Keep getting better. I see you, Sky”. I wonder if he remembers that. Lol. That comment was one of the best compliments I had ever received in my life .. even to this day. It just let me know that all along, I could have been myself .. and been happy being myself and the right people would have gravitated towards me from the beginning.

But everything happens for a reason.

I know that.

As a matter of fact, I am grateful it didn’t happen from the beginning because I wouldn’t have learned to love myself the way I do now. I wouldn’t have grown. Every hardship that I have overcome has helped shape me into a better person.


Making this this blog, has been about continuing to open myself up, in hopes to inspire at least one person. Or to help at least one person. Or to let at least one person know that they are not alone … and it is okay to be weird lol. With that being said, I hope that you guys enjoyed this post – a little more intimate side of me and who I am. Like the title says, this was just the beginning so stay tuned for part two. ❤

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Haul Time| Home Decor & Style ReVamp

It’s always fun to have a day (every once in a while) where nothing matters. You just enjoy the day for what is, take in the scenery, breathe and let go … and if you can do a little shopping!

This past Saturday, I visited Tanger Outlets/Foxwood Casinos in Connecticut and picked up a few different items (boyyyy, was I loving the sales!)

Btw| I won $40 at the Casino. I felt like a superstar! Lmao

Here are the things that I purchased:

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There’s something sexy yet sophisticated about Button Up’s. These H&M Button Up’s cost $12.99 which drew me right in (usually, I see Button Up’s going for $20 and up) and lately, I’ve been trying to revamp my style. It’s not news that my style is very bohemian inspired but lately I’ve become drawn to the minimalist/chic look which reminds me of sultry yet ‘grown woman’ vibes.

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I then saw these jeans and listen …. I loveeeeeee a good sale! I had been looking for a nice pair of black ripped jeans (and white ones) so when I saw these (and that price) I had to get it. As for the second pair of jeans, you really can’t go wrong with jeans that cost 10 bucks so I picked those up as well. When you’re a bit of a curvy girl, it’s hard to find jeans that compliment both your hips and waist but I find that H&M very rarely lets me down in that department.

Note: These jeans are a size 10 but my size varies with the style and cut of each pair of jeans. These two jeans had AMAZING stretch so size 10 was perfect and gave me some breathing room too.


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I stopped by Bath & Body Works (who is having an amazing sale by the way!) and picked up a few fragrances, two candles and a some lotion. Let me tell you, those Pineapple Mango candles smell soooooo good!

Note| If you are interested in candles, fragrances, shower gels etc … the sale is 75% off. These items were originally 13 dollars and up and I ended up getting them for about 3-4 dollars.


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I am lacking in the summer department so I decided to pick up a pair of shorts. American Eagle is another place that does me justice in the jeans department … however their prices aren’t always ‘broke blogger’ friendly. So, I was really happy that these shorts were 40% off, high waisted and with great stretch!

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There’s nothing really to this shirt. I bought it because I thought it was cute lol.


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Before leaving the outlet, we stopped in Charlotte Russe. I loved their clothing items and their prices but the quality of clothing wasn’t doing it for me so I opted out of purchasing anything in that department lol. However, along with that minimalist/chic look that I been loving lately, statement neck pieces are slowly but surely becoming my thing. Like I said the prices in CR are great so I snagged these for 5 dollars each.


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Last, but certainly not least I picked a few things at my local TJ Maxx, yesterday. I have been redecorating my room and the sign “Choose Your Own Adventure” really stuck out to me so I had to purchase that. I’ve been printing out all of my pictures recently so I snagged a vintage picture frame as well. To finish off my purchase, I picked up  2 Indian made porcelain dishes.

I have a few more purchases to make to kick start my summer and the redecoration of my room but I think this was a good start. I hope you all enjoyed this mini haul ❤

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12 Black Businesses To Shop From

For the past few months I have been really keen on switching over to buying from my black sisters and brothers. Here, I have compiled a short list of 12 black businesses that I have (or plan) to buy from/support in the upcoming weeks. Check it out ! ❤

For Head Gear

  1. Visit The Wrap Life .


Out of Brooklyn, NY, Nnenna Stella offers a variety of beautiful hand printed African inspired head wraps among other things.

2. Visit Loc Soc

Bear

This business offers a wrap that is for fashion and protective styling. Two in one! Made with locs in mind, it has now been adapted to wear with any style, length or texture of hair.


Apparel

3. Visit Kashmir.VIII

Image of Adore (All Over Tee)

Kashmir Thompson’s giant selection offers everything from clutches, t-shirts to even coasters.

Image of Grace (Clutch)

4. Visit The Very Black Project

_DSC0022-2.jpgCreated in 2014, this website features hats and sweatshirts (among other things) and was made so that we could un-apologetically love our blackness. Lol, how could you not want to support that?

5. Visit Tees In The Trap

This website features phone cases, coffee mugs, totes and of course t-shirts. All of these items are accented with popular terms and catch phrases from the hip-hop community, black culture and just everyday life.

6. Visit Mo’s Bows

Yellow Floral

A 14 year old from Memphis is the CEO of Mo’s Bows hand made bow ties. He realized his love for fashion and at the age of 9 started his own company. I think we should all take the time out to re-evaluate our lives because this kid is amazing, lol!

7. Visit Gloss Rags
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This website features the names of our brothers and sisters that have been victims of police brutality, unfair justice system and unjustified killings on t-shirts. It’s a beautiful way to pay homage to those who are no longer with us.


Hair Care

8. Visit Camille Rose Naturals
Moroccan Pear Conditioning Custrad is a culinary cocktail blend of nourishing oils to soften and protect the hair's moisture barrier. Recipe: Our natural buttercream base is silkened with a culinary cocktail oil blend of Moroccan pear, Cherry Kernel and Urica (nettle). Vitamin-rich extracts A,B,C,D & K are mixed with protective Antioxidants to offer potent nourishment to strands in need of a little TLC. Rich Omega 6 and 9 top off this powerfully sweet conditioning treat for all hair types.

To all my brothers and sisters that are interested in using all natural products, this is for you! Developed in 2010 by Janell Stephens, Camille Rose Naturals is dedicated to providing hair care as well as beauty care products that are natural and hand made.


Beauty

9. Visit The Lip Bar

 

This website features a variety of beautiful lipsticks. Besides the amazing price, I love that they use natural ingredients such as jojoba oil and shea butter in their products.

10. Visit  Ka’oir Cosmetics

Baby Bleu by Kaoir

CEO Keyshia Ka’oir offers a make up line that has the most radiant and beautiful lipsticks. Her website also features lashes, and nail products.


Fun!

11. Visit Cards For All People

Black Card Revoked - Original Flavor

Reminiscent of the popular game ‘Cards Against Humanity’, Cards For All People challenges your knowledge about black culture.


Jewelry

12. Visit Cielo’s Hippie Shop

Lapis Adjustable Necklace - De La Jipi Collection

Now what kind of person would I be if I didn’t feature myself in this list of black businesses to shop from, lol! I am very much inspired by bohemian culture and incorporate a variety of healing stones in my designs.


With that being said, I hope you enjoyed this short list of black businesses to buy from. ❤

xoxo
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Coachella | 4/20 : California Fun

Oh my, have I missed blogging!

Two weeks ago, I finally scratched Coachella off of my bucket list. Around this time last year, I gifted myself with tickets to Weekend 2 of this infamous music festival as a graduation gift.

I flew into California on April 19th with my best friend, Justine. For the first two days of my trip, I stayed in Los Angeles. It was my second time there and being that this time around it was planned, I actually really got to enjoy LA. I stayed with my Godmother, so I didn’t really have to worry about any extra expenses which was a relief because … Coachella is no joke.

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The first day we got there, we decided to go to Venice Beach. The Venice Beach strip actually reminded my a lot of the Miami Beach strip (just a lot shorter) and of Manhattan because along the strip there were so many people hustling and trying to make money which I really respected. There was a lot of local artists, musicians, etc. My friend and I both got henna done – I was happy about that until … it only lasted for 2 days.
I also met a really sweet man who designed jewelry … and he was Jamaican so you know I had to support <3.
However, I think my favorite part of Venice Beach was this Native American store that we came across. If you guys don’t know by now … I am obsessed with learning about new cultures so seeing the Native American art and clothing and designs really intrigued me.

When we got to the end of the strip, we saw what looked like an amusement park. So we kept walking. Little did we know, we were walking to Santa Monica. When we got to the amusement park, it was closing. We were a little bummed out BUT it was still a good walk and we took tons of pictures and videos. We continued exploring a little before heading back to my Godmothers house.

The next day .. which was 4/20 … well we did what just about anyone does on 4/20! It was actually cool because Marijuana is legal in California. So they have these little corner stores where you basically just go in and order your weed. I’m talking gummy bears, hot cheetos, lollipops … all infused with the good ole herb.

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The following day we headed to Indio Valley, which is where Coachella is. The ride there wasn’t too bad, we ended up taking Amtrak and a bus. It was about a 2 1/2 hour ride in total. When we got there we had to wait a little because our other friend whose name was on the hotel check in hadn’t arrived in Cali yet. No worries though, we stayed by the pool, tanned a little bit and waited for her.

Side Bar: The hotel wasn’t my favorite. Being that we paid so much money for the hotel, Coachella tickets and airfare .. it was kind of annoying that the hotel food was so pricey. I mean we didn’t even get complimentary breakfast bro. Of the overpriced food that they did have, there wasn’t much to cater to non meat eaters like myself which added on to my annoyance. And there wasn’t much around us  .. except for a Walgreens so we couldn’t go out and stock the hotel room.

The 22nd is when the real fun began – the first day of Coachella ! Being that we were new to the whole Coachella scene .. I will say that Friday was my least favorite day. Only because we were kind of all over the place seeing as how we didn’t know what to expect. Because of this we didn’t see too many performances. We did see A$AP Rocky and some dude name G Eazy though lol. Oh! and it was at this exact moment that I realized allergies were going to kick my ass during Coachella.

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That Saturday, was cool. That was everyone else’s favorite day lol. Ice Cube performed and brought out The Game and Guns N Roses performed too. I’ll be honest, I don’t really care about Guns N Roses but Ice Cube was pretty dope. This day went MUCH better because we went in with what we called our “Game Plan”.
*Arrive, Eat, Buy Water, Head to front of Stage*
That’s literally what we had to do to ensure we got good spots.

The final day .. DAY 3 was my favorite. We saw Sia perform, Major Lazor and Calvin Harris. Although, I will say Calvin Harris’s performance disappointed me. I couldn’t get to enjoy his performance at all because he is obsessed with fog machines. Like, HELLO … I can’t see you if all you keep doing is turning this damn fog machine on lol.
Sia’s performance however, was just AMAZING (especially her dancers) & Major Lazor gave me life. It’s no secret that Coachella is mostly for indie music and celebrates a lot of rock music with hints of rap here and there.. but Major Lazor came through with something for Caribbean people to enjoy which of course … I did thoroughly appreciate. I remember, I just kept thinking to myself .. “look how influential Caribbean culture is .. specifically Jamaican culture”. I mean even Calvin Harris had a little reggae segment!

What I also loved about Coachella was being able to hear and appreciate bands that I wouldn’t have known otherwise. My two new favorite bands are Chvrches, which is this awesome Scottish band and right out of Brooklyn a band called Matt & Kim.

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All in all, I loved Coachella. Would I do it again? I don’t know .. maybe if I got V.I.P tickets because honestly, pushing through crowds .. wasn’t fun and isn’t my thing. But the experience was a beautiful one. I’m definitely glad I went.

xoxo
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Before You Love Them | Love Yourself

Love is a feeling – truth. You can experience love by simply loving yourself – truth. You can also experience love by loving someone else – truth. Some people feel unfulfilled unless they find love from a significant other or family member or friend – truth.
However, the truth is also that we don’t need the love of another to experience true love but many fail to realize that.

I mean at one point, I failed to realize that. For the most part, my friends and I have what many would call “daddy issues”. We would talk about how our fathers continuously disappointed us and weren’t really there for us growing up as we would have liked. Although none of us ever said it, the feeling that penetrated the room as we spoke of our fathers was heavy. We were sad, hurt and feeling unworthy of love. And that’s just an example, it could be with any family member or loved one.

I can even recall so many instances that my friends and I would sit in a circle discussing the traits that we would want in a significant other and wondering WHEN that person was going to just walk right into our path. We would discuss the many ways that we would show our love and talk about how different this one would be from the last. Then, we would be so hard on ourselves if a ‘situationship’ didn’t work out and really self doubt our love for ourselves and contemplate what traits we needed to fix in order to hold the attention of a potential.

We often wondered why ___ didn’t love us or ____ wasn’t attracted to us or what it was that we did wrong.  When in reality the only trait we needed to fix was that we weren’t falling in love with ourselves first, but trying to find love outside of ourselves.

I am firm believer that you can not help anyone, can not love anyone (truly love), can not inspire anyone etc until you do these things for yourself (or at least try).

As I am on this journey to self love and happiness and tranquility and all things positive, I have had setbacks Self-Lovewith love – especially the love I have for myself. So I concocted a list of ways to begin the process of falling in love with yourself. Now keep in mind that I am a work in progress and these have been working for me – but we all are different. I suggest you all give this list a try and add on anything (positive) that will work for you.

1. Live In Your Truth

For a LONG time I was afraid of being me. In turn I couldn’t fully grasp the idea of loving myself because I was being a superficial version of myself. I tried to be the person I thought my family wanted, the person that my ‘friends’ would want to be a around and the person that I thought was deserving of a partner.

Then I realized that I am a fierce, beautiful, self proclaimed weird girl, hippie chick, pro-melanin, flower child, Rasta enthusiast, artist, culture lover, natural haired, light skinned, brown eyes, spiritual being, (and much more) woman. That is my truth and I decided to live in it. And if the people in my life don’t accept that or want that or understand that truth .. that’s their problem, not mine.

Now your truth doesn’t have to be ANYTHING like mine. You just have to accept it and take pride in it -whatever it is and you are already going down the right path.


2. Don’t Lose Yourself For Someone Else

Now I’m not saying compromise isn’t necessary with ANYONE that you love (partner, family, friends), because it is – but when you start to compromise your self love and things that you truly believe in, maybe it’s time to take a step back and really look at the situation you are in. Don’t lose yourself trying to love someone else.


3. Write As Many Lists As Needed

Now this may just be my thing .. but writing lists makes me feel like I have my life sorted out – or like I’m getting there.

I love writing lists about every and anything. As you guys can see I wrote a list about 51 things that make me happy. Just the same, I wrote a list about things that make me sad in hopes of changing those things or eliminating those things from my life.

I wrote a list about places that I would love to travel to. A list about things that I need to change in my physical and spiritual life. Then I jot down ways to accomplish these things. And as I do, I feel empowered, one with my emotions, I have a sense of self and I feel like I’m taking steps to fully fall in love with myself.


4. Take The Time To Be Alone … And Enjoy It

This may be what I struggle with most. Sometimes, I’m alone and I’m fine. Sometimes, I’m alone and I feel lonely and I HATE it.I’m trying to cut that out.

I think that whenever we are alone, we need to appreciate that. Enjoy that time to just be. Write. Think (not too much lol). Read. Blog. Youtube. Watch Tv. Do Yoga. Exercise. Write a list lol. Do anything – just appreciate that time.

Also take yourself on a date. Don’t worry, I’m working up the courage to take myself out, too.


5. Find What Inspires You

Find the key, your muse, your inspiration and let that help to lift you up.

What’s mine?
Love. Positivity. Seeing my end goal of happiness and self love and success in the horizon. Sometimes, I breathe, relax, cry a little and believe in and feel my goals and dreams coming to life. It is in that moment that I feel ultimate peace.


6. Spend Time With People Who Bring Light Into Your Life

Sometimes being alone is good. Sometimes being around loved ones is better. Spend time with people who TRULY get you and bring happiness, calmness, liveliness and just beautiful luminescent light into your life.


7. Understand Your Worth

You are worth the love you give to yourself. You are worth living in your truth. You are worth writing down as many lists as you need. You are worth having your alone time. You are worth feeling inspired. You are worth being around loved ones. You are worth EVERYTHING that YOU BELIEVE you are worth.

So start believing that you are worth it.

Stop accepting positive things into your life by saying “it’s just luck” or “omg I can’t believe that happened to me”. Believe it, it’s more than luck because YOU ARE WORTH IT. We all are.


8. Look In The Mirror … Talk To Yourself

Now it might sound crazy …. but it’s not. Sometimes when I’m feeling down and nothing else is working, I walk over to my mirror. I stare at myself .. for a while, most of the times tears streaming down my face and I give myself a pep talk.

If I have to yell at myself, then I do.”Get it together! You are better than this.”

If I need to some positive words, then I give them. “You got this.”

If I need to remind myself not to get so worked up, I remind. “Relax, breathe.”

If I need a hug, I wrap my arms around my waist and I give it.

I look into that mirror and I give myself whatever I need because when everything else is gone, when everyone else returns to their own life … all you have is you.

And that has got to be enough. The love you have for yourself .. it has to be enough.

So love yourself first.

 

xoxo
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Travel Goals – 2016 & Beyond

I’m in my early 20’s. No career, currently out of school, no MAJOR bills to pay and no kids. If you are like me then you know .. this is the time to travel! Now, don’t get me wrong, this is NO shade to people that have careers, children, bills or who are in school – actually I respect those that are in those situations but I am also happy that I don’t have those responsibilities yet! Not saying that if you have these responsibilities that it can’t be done but quite honestly, not having those major responsibilities like a career or children does make it easier to dive right into the world of traveling.

My mother always told me that this is my time to live! To explore and to conquer! With that being said one of my goals for the next 5 years is to start traveling like a maniac. So I thought, why not create a bucket list -if you will- of places that I have my eyes on. Some of these places I’ve been to but I never really got the chance to explore and really submerge myself into the customs and culture and that is really my main goal. Hopefully, I can start crossing these beautiful places off my list sooner rather than later!

  1. Amsterdam
  2. Sweden
  3. England
  4. Kenya
  5. Jamaica
  6. Panama
  7. Costa Rica
  8. Puerto Rico
  9. Texas
  10. Las Vegas
  11. Trinidad
  12. Barbados
  13. Bahamas
  14. St. Thomas
  15. Turks and Caicos
  16. Thailand
  17. St. Lucia
  18. St. Marteen
  19. New Zealand
  20. Fiji
  21. South Africa
  22. St. Kitts
  23. Belize
  24. Mexico
  25. Venzuela
  26. Chile
  27. Colombia
  28. France
  29. Curacao
  30. Cape Verde

What are some places you hope to visit in the next few years?

xoxo
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Uplifting Quotes To Brighten Your Day … & Mine

In a time like this I need some positive words to surround me and I know that I’m not alone. Whether it be a person, a thing or situation, we all have times that we just need to be surrounded by positivity and good vibes. So I wanted to give you guys that and truthfully I need to give myself that.

Here are some of my favorite uplifting quotes.

“Without struggle there is no progress.” Image result for without struggle there is no progressThe real quote by Frederick Douglass reads “If there is no struggle there is no progress” but I tend to prefer the modified version. During my times of self doubt and when I am struggling to better myself or succeed at something I try my hardest to remember this quote. This is a quote that has ALWAYS helped me push through and persevere during difficult times.

“If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.”This quote is by one of my favorite psychologist, Abraham Maslow. So, read it. Read it again. Let in sink in.  When I first read this quote, I was taken aback. I literally stared in awe for a few minutes because it is so true. If we continue to see everything with a one sided mind or from our own perspective, we will never be able to know any other solution. Every problem we come across, we will try to solve the same way. Every disagreement, every misunderstanding .. everything! And that is no way to operate. Every situation is different. Every person is different. You have to be able to at least attempt to understand things in a different light. You have to be able to take a step back and try different tactics to handle different scenarios and that is something I had to learn. Once I learned the meaning of this quote, it helped me with future problems .. and it still helps me.

“If you plan on being anything less than you are capable of being, you will probably be unhappy all the days of your life” and “A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be ultimately at peace with himself”. I combined these two because they essentially mean the same thing but I love both of these quotes and couldn’t pick one. What I get from these quotes is – do what makes you happy and nothing less .. or you will be unhappy! Work to your highest and best ability and don’t give up. Even if there’s turbulence along the way. Even if you have nay sayers surrounding you. Even if you feel like your best isn’t enough. Even if self doubt is getting the best of you. Keep going, keep trying and don’t give up. It is better to try and fail than to not try at all (another favorite quote of mine lol) because in you trying you are reaching the goal you were meant to. So many times I see people go into professions or do things that they don’t necessarily want to do because they are thinking about the people around them or money but in the end they turn out to be so unfulfilled and not at peace. We have to come to the conclusion that we must do what makes us happy. We have to do it for ourselves and no one else. We must live to our greatest potential and travel along that path to self love and happiness and then we will attain peace <3.

“If I were dropped out of a plane into the ocean and told the nearest land was a thousand miles away, I’d still swim. And I’d despise the one who gave up.” This is another Abraham Maslow quote and I promise the last one! Lol. I adore this quote. You have to keep trying. No matter what. No matter how difficult the task. It’s that simple. That’s it.

“I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.” I love this quote because it’s just saying that no matter where life may take you, you have to learn to go with it and change when needed so that you meet whatever goal you have set for yourself. Throughout life, whatever goal you are pushing for, the path to that goal will very rarely go the way you expect it. There will be ups and downs, right turns and wrong ones but you have to gain the mindset that these things -everything really- happens for a reason. And that reason is to make you a better person and after facing those obstacles, reaching that goal will only be more fulfilling!

“No weapon formed against you shall prosper and every tongue that rises against you in judgement shall be condemned.” I couldn’t NOT include a bible quote and to be honest this might be my favorite on this list. There was a time in my life (at a young age) that I was going through so much. One day, I was talking to my aunt over the phone and I literally broke down. She consoled me, talked to me so calm and started reading the bible. Now I am not religious (I do believe in God though) but something about the way she spoke to me helped. Before we got off the phone she told me to write something down. I got a pen and paper and she recited those words to me. Then she told me to put it on the door of my room and every night before I went to bed and every morning before I left the house to say these words. I don’t know if she even remembers that but even now before I leave the house I say those words in my head. No weapon that forms against you will prosper. Those weapons will form but if you keep your faith, work hard and stay positive they won’t prosper – they can’t. And every person that judges you or your situation can’t prosper. So stay positive and focus on that goal. Strive to achieve it and you will.

So these are some of my favorite uplifting quotes. If you are feeling down for whatever reason, I hope this helped you. ❤

xoxo
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