the passion (and purpose) behind it all

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saturday, 8:24 a.m

i’m up. tea to the right of me. book to the left. pen tucked behind my ear. most importantly, phone out of sight. i’m present.

my passion and purpose in this realm is something that i had often thought about. but my fear made me halt that thought process … or rather, i let my fear halt that thought process. and i know it’s important to live in the present, but to live in the present aimlessly? i don’t know about that.

but life has a way of shaking things up when you’ve gotten too complacent -too stagnant, too comfortable. it has a way of telling you that how you are living wasn’t the way intended. but what do you then?

well, i reflected. it took a while.
but first, i kicked myself out the fearful rut that was making me a stranger to my own creativity. i guess i should start with that right?
i pushed and pushed. i did a lot of writing and meditating and pouring into self .. i didn’t realize my glass was emptyyyyy! and by doing these things, reflection came.

my reflecting first started by confronting why i was afraid, acknowledging that and holding myself accountable for how i let fear hold me down and back and then taking action on it -which i now realize will have to be another post, lol.

after that,  i checked in with myself (and still am checking in with myself). i already had a list of interests, life goals, priorities, values, morals.

  • but were those things (listed above) in alliance with my passion?
  • am i still passionate about the things i was passionate about 5 years ago, 2 years ago, last year, last month?
  • what am i passionate about now?
  • does my passion align with my purpose?
  • what is my purpose?

& so, as i reflected and thought and discussed with close friends, these are the answers i have come up with. after reading mine (or even before), I challenge you to answer those questions as well.


some of my interests are art, self care, mental wellness, culture, black entrepreneurship, holistic (natural) living (among others).
my life goals and priorities include helping, bringing light to the usage of art in the mental health world, being wealthy, to be well versed in travel and different cultures, to live a peaceful, successful, happy and freeing life. waking up in the morning and loving what i do.
i value and moralize justice, diplomacy, equality, love, transparency, hard work, tranquility, hope, faith ….

and thinking back, the things that i was passionate about at 19/20 have transferred over to the various stages in my life. these are still the things that evoke emotion out of me now.
i am still passionate about helping others and art and helping others through art.
if i am able to change the life -truly change the life of at least one person i would be forever happy.

and so do i believe that my purpose aligns with my passion?
100%

i believe my purpose is to help others recognize and see the art within themselves and connect to themselves on different levels. and use that newfound awareness of self to spread love and light and positivity.

i believe my purpose is to use all that i have gained in this realm to help and be of service to others (thanks for those words bee lol -described that perfectly).

i believe that the most high put me here with a gift of empathy and resilience and passion. passion is a gift , ya know? lol.  and i believe that these gifts were given to me, not without reason.

saturday. 9:17 a.m

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what does living a soft + strong life mean to you? look like to you?

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I’ve realized that I’m not ready to be consistent with my blogging again and I’ve become okay with that. Nevertheless, I saw this writing prompt (the title) on instagram from BlackGirlInOm and kind of felt compelled to write, which honestly hasn’t happened in a while. So, here it goes …

There’s a very popular quote that goes around. It says “Self care and self love is not selfish”. I disagree. It is, 100 percent. Living a soft + strong life (to me) is acknowledging that, standing firm in that and being okay with that.

It is knowing that before I pour into someone else’s glass, mine must be full. I must be full.

It is accepting (healthy + constructive) criticism and turning it so that it is able to positively impact me. At the same time, being able to weed out those who only mean me harm and being adamant about not having those people and/or things in my life, in my energy, penetrating my aura.

It is staying strong in my belief that my purpose is indeed powerful and necessary and was made just for me. And staying soft is giving myself the space to make mistakes, take in lessons, grow, change my mind, process and just be! It is the will and want to keep growing and getting better. Being a better and healthier (mentally, spiritually, physically -and of course financially) version of myself.

It is saying no and yes. When I want. Without feeling pressured into explaining myself or feeling guilty about choosing myself first. It is checking out to focus on myself when I see fit. But making sure that I stay in tuned with my loved ones. Being reliable and dependent but not a stool lifting everyone up while I am left depleted.

One of things I think about when I think about gaining strength through spiritual journeys is the task of being alone. Being alone allows me to really tap in to self; monitor my emotions, follow my intuition and dive into my creativeness. But, it is no easy feat. Hence, the strength part. Living a strong + soft life is taking time to be alone whilst remembering that it does not mean that I am lonely. It means, taking time to be with loved ones when I do start to feel that way. And most importantly, knowing that being alone and being with loved ones are both okay.

There are times when my strength waivers. When I’m feeling low, down and just out of it. Living a soft life is allowing myself to feel and journey through these places of self doubt and sadness. Living a strong life is making sure that I don’t wallow in this sadness. That I don’t settle there + make a home out of tears, ruffled hair and un-ironed t-shirts. Living a soft + strong life is realizing that there is both strength and softness in vulnerability. It is climbing out of that and remaining powerful and humble, loud in my self love and calm throughout my journey.

I’m gonna give another quote, but this one’s by me; “my light reigns supreme. my spirit reigns supreme.” Living this balanced life of strength and gentleness is standing firm in my belief that I am worthy. So much so, I got it tattooed. Permanent reminder, lol!

It is waking up every morning, blessed with another 24 hours and deciding that I am worthy, I matter and I am enough. And, while I may not be enough for anyone else .. I must be enough for/to myself before all.

And last, it is laughing. Like heartfelt cackling, tears falling from your eyes laughter. Surrounding myself with LOVE. Making sure that the energy I put into the world is that that I wish to receive. It is journaling and yoga and meditation and communication and tears and sorrow and dips, twists and turns and happiness and joy and working and walking towards to all of my dreams and goals.

 

2017 Take Aways

It’s been a while and that’s an under statement.
I had/ have to figure things out and I needed a break. Around the end of October, I felt myself falling into a depression. Mostly because I’m not where I envisioned myself being. I lost motivation. I lost hope. I kind of began to lose myself. It honestly seemed like things were piling up against me and there was no way out. More anxiety. More tears than usual. I can’t even begin to describe the feeling that I felt. Annnddddd right when I was about to really slip into the sunken place (lol), I began to drag myself out – legit a few days ago haha. I had a talk with one of my best friends and I really began to re-evaluate things. Anyways, better late than never and definitely great before the new year.

I thought that it would only be fitting that my first post back would be some little tid bits from 2017. And also a picture of my face lol.


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🌻 speaking things into existence does work.
🌻 i will prosper beyond belief in 2018.
🌻 i have grown mentally and spiritually, now i’m just waiting on financially. 😂
🌻 i don’t give myself enough credit.
🌻 but i’m lit … okuhh. 😇😏
🌻 i still let other peoples words define how i travel on and through my journey. i’ve gotten better but i need to work on that more for this new year.
🌻 i don’t have the time, patience or energy for relationships (romantic or not) that do not serve me. understand that i wish you the best but please go away.✌🏾
🌻 i should stop eating pizza so much 😂 but it’s soooooo good!
🌻 falling in love with myself was the easy part …
🌻 staying in love with myself through self doubts and lessons not yet learned is the hard part … and i have decided that I am willing to put in that work.
🌻 i need to stop stressing things/people that aren’t for me. i also need to recognize when things and people aren’t for me.
🌻 i get bored easily. i’m either passionate about something or utterly uninterested. i think it’s a libra thing.
🌻 iamworthy. always.
🌻 one of my biggest goals for 2017 was being unapologetic about how i feel and how i move through those feelings and spaces – i accomplished this. i am proud and sooooo not sorry.
🌻 stagnancy and complacency are not my cup of tea.
🌻 i am not everyone’s cup of tea … or choice of liquor for that matter. 😝
🌻 & that’s okay.
🌻 i journey at my own pace, in my own way and quite frankly i’m learning to not give a fuck about that.
🌻 I am. I can. I will – my personal mantra for this upcoming year. 🌻 All in all, Love is art, Art is peace, Peace is freedom and freedom, my loves .. Freedom is everything.

Peace, love & happiness
-Sky Britnei

things i’ve learned about love

  • not all love is a forever love
  • it is okay to start over in love
  • love starts with me
  • love is all around me
  • there are flaws in love, but if its real love .. those flaws won’t matter. those flaws enhance that love
  • love changes you .. its up to you whether that be for the better or for the worse
  • i deserve love
  • i deserve to give love
  • trust and love go hand in hand
  • communication and trust go hand in hand
  • therefore love without communication won’t prosper
  • you can be wrong, i can be wrong … that doesn’t mean that together we aren’t right
  • love can be complicated .. but that’s because we make it that way. love is simple
  • i couldn’t give love to others until i began to give love to myself
  • being appreciative of the love you receive is extremely important
  • being appreciated for the love you give is equally important
  • love doesn’t hurt – we do
  • love is apart of me -in my nature

things i’ve learned about self-care

  • it’s needed
  • it’s important
  • it’s essential to growth
  • it comes in different forms
  • it is different for each of us -as long as it’s positive
  • music makes me happy
    • especially bob marley and lauryn hill
  • journaling also makes me very happy
  • and so does sipping wine
  • self affirmations help increase your self esteem
  • self care is how you begin to fall in love with yourself
  • it is how you begin to build positive and uplifting relationships
  • self care is knowing that you are worthy of more than just the bare minimum and expecting nothing less than the best
  • self care is honesty to self
  • it’s putting your happiness first and foremost
  • but not forgetting about the people that you love
  • its spending quality time with yourself and not feeling lonely
  • self care is helping yourself
  • self care is waking up every morning and deciding that you have a purpose
  • self care = self love

20 inspiring quotes from paulo coelho

Keep reading to be inspired by the writer who helped shape my spiritual journey.

One of the most inspirational books that I’ve read thus far has been ‘The Alchemist’ by 9780062315007_p0_v2_s192x300Paulo Coelho. I personally feel that it takes a unique kind of person to read AND understand what this book means. It’ll only resonate with you if you are on some type of spiritual journey. So it only made sense that this book landed on my lap right before my 23rd birthday. As I read this book, I remember feeling .. indescribable, awakened, free, positive … like I could conquer the world.

This book inspired me to be my best self and gave me proof that my spiritual journey was just beginning and would be filled with much enlightenment and understanding. However, it also inspired me to look up the artist of this classic piece of work -Paulo Coelho. I was so intrigued by the story itself, that it made me wonder about him and how he came about writing such a pivotal story.

 Paulo Coelho , the alchemist , spiritual , journey, love

So I took to google … because I’m a google nerd and I can’t help it, lol. And while I found some incredible facts about Mr. Coelho, the most interesting things that I found were some of his quotes. Quotes from The Alchemist and quotes from his other books (which I am definitely in the process of getting). I decided to share these quotes with you because reading them reignited the feeling of hopefulness and prosperity and light that I felt while reading The Alchemist. So I hope you all appreciate these quotes as much as I did.


  1. When we strive to be better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.

2. Life has a way of testing a person’s will, either by having nothing happen at all or by having everything happen at once.

3. The act of discovering  who we are, will force us to accept that we can go further than we think.

4. The secret of life, though, is to fall seven times and to get up eight.spiritual journey the alchemist paulo coelho

5. There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of
failure.

6. One day you will wake up and there won’t be any more time to do the things you’ve always wanted. Do it now.

7. Everything tells me that I am about to make a wrong decision, but making mistakes is just part of life. What does the world want of me? Does it want me to take no risks, to go back to where I came from because I didn’t have the courage to say “yes” to life?

8. Remember that wherever your heart is, there you will find your treasure.

9. When I had nothing to lose, I had everything. When I stopped being who I am, I found myself.

10. Nothing in the world is ever completely wrong. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.

11. When you find your path, you must not be afraid. You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes. Disappointment, defeat, and despair are the tools God uses to show us the way.

12. Our true friends are those who are with us when the good things happen. They cheer us on and are pleased by our triumphs. False friends only appear at difficult times, with their sad, supportive faces, when, in fact, our suffering is serving to console them for their miserable lives.

13. Don’t give in to your fears. If you do, you won’t be able to talk to your heart.

5634b33025af02bd6ed24e45cec15b5814. This is what we call love. When you are loved, you can do anything in creation. When you are loved, there’s no need at all to understand what’s happening, because everything happens within you.

15. When each day is the same as the next, it’s because people fail to recognize the good things that happen in their lives every day that the sun rises.

16. There are moments when troubles enter our lives and we can do nothing to avoid them. But they are there for a reason. Only when we have overcome them will we understand why they were there.

17. Your eyes show the strength of your soul.

18. The two hardest tests on the spiritual road are the patience to wait for the right moment and the courage not to be disappointed with what we encounter.

19. Now that she had nothing to lose, she was free.

20. To realize one’s destiny is a persons only obligation.


xoxo,

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what makes you feel free?

the moon. the stars. being on tropical islands while the wind blows through my hair. sand. the ocean. the sound of the waves. poetry. yoga. yoga on the beach. vibing out during summer nights. candles. candles lit while reading poetry. candles lit while doing yoga. activating crystals. laughing. like, genuine laughter. crying after having held in my emotions. the smell of lavender. the smell of peppermint. putting my head under water. getting lost in a good book. getting lost in music. understanding art from the artists point of view. indulging in new and different cultures. the wind. being randomly inspired. rain. getting lost in happy memories. grass, although i’m allergic lol. water. the sound of water. the feeling of it against my skin -especially after a long day. waking up in bliss. writing, like now -so therapeutic. being alone, now that i’ve come to appreciate what that means. also, being around people that i know i can be myself around. positive energy in it’s rarest form. genuine happiness. genuine love.


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There’s this girl that I’m friends with on Facebook and she always posts the most thought invoking statuses. I love it, lol! Friday night blues, whilst I scrolled through my feed and a status of hers popped up – “What makes you feel free?”

I didn’t want to bombard her status with such a lengthy reply but I was also very tempted to reflect and answer the question for myself.

There are some days where we feel out of it, constricted and not in control of our lives. Sometimes, we need a (sort of) trigger or spark to help remind us that so many things ARE in fact right. So many things are freeing. It’s just up to us to remember to take that time for yourselves to indulge in those things. And it’s okay to need that reminder. And it’s okay that that reminder may happen at the most random times -hence a simple FB question.

Today, right now .. in this moment, I needed that reminder. Of all the things that make me feel free. Funny how the universe works, right?

Take some time to reflect .. what makes you feel free?

xoxo,

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how i journal

I’m always looking for new ways to self help, love and meditate. I think that it’s super important to take time for yourself (at least) once a week to really just be and indulge in all things therapeutic for you.

I’ve always loved to write and document my feelings .. so when I started to come across books dedicated to just that, I thought that it would be interesting to try. Needless to say, journaling is now one of my favorite therapeutic methods and definitely helps to keep me sane and grounded during the week. It has also opened me up to expressing my feelings without feeling inferior or obscure.

Below, I listed the journaling books that are helping me right now! So I hope that you guys enjoy and decide to try one (or all!) of these books for yourself.


52 Lists Project
by Moorea Seal

This book is all about list making (which is one of my favorite things to do)! It’s all about listing the positive aspects in your life. Some of my favorite lists include “List all the people who brighten your day”, “List your dreams”Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset and “List your favorite quotes”. After each list is made, there is a section called ‘Take Action’ which
inspires/challenges us to take positive actions based on the list that we have constructed. For example – After you have listed all the people who brighten your day, you are challenged to write a sweet note or do something thoughtful for at least one of the people on your list.

The book offers 52 lists .. one for each week of the year. The best part? You get to reflect any time you want. It definitely promotes self love and awareness .. and makes me feel lighter somehow -I guess it’s the recognition that I have many positive things in my life even when I don’t feel like it.

Because this book has become so successful, the author has now released ’52 Lists For Happiness’ which I plan on snagging once I’ve completed this book.

 


#ANote2Self Meditation Journal
by Alex Elle

If you haven’t heard of Alex Elle, let me be the first to tell you that you have been sitting under a rock, lol. She is a poet/writer but most importantly she is an advocate foralex elle médiation journal anote2self blogger blog self care/self love and that is probably why she is definitely my top 3 favorite people right now. Not only are her poetry books filled with self affirmations and signs of remarkable growth but she released a book dedicated to her readers journaling their own growth. Each page is structurally laid out, with the first question being different each day. Some questions that are asked are “How have you healed?”, “How do you process negative emotions”and “What is something that you need to relinquish to attain happiness?”. ALL of the questions are strategically placed and invoke thought. Along with those questions, the writer (me and you, lol) is asked to write down their intentions for the day, some things that they need to work on and what they’re thankful for (amongst other things). This book is so important for journaling your growth. I’m not even half way done and I find myself looking back at the first few pages whilst I marvel at how I’ve grown in my journey thus far. This book is a must have.

 



wildflower flower childrenHow To be A Wildflower
by Katie Daisy

For all my free spirits and flower children, this is for you! Art is so
important to me and so is expression of self and feeling free.

That is why I love this book. This book uses art and the love of finding freedom to promote self love/self care. It also puts this in a more fun, interactive and unconventional way. It features things from ‘5 Hot Springs You Need to Visit’, ‘Take a Full Moon Hike and Let The Moon Light Your Path’, writing activities, drawing activities to even making your own flower crown. Oh, and it shows you how to purify your water. Flower children, rejoice! This book is perfect.


xoxo,
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snow daze

I’m frequently asked about some of my self love/self care methods. Today was the perfect day to indulge in just that. Taking advantage of Brooklyn’s snow day, I decided to cuddle up and tell you guys just how I catered to myself today.

Happy February beautiful souls! I’m a few (well, more than a few) days late for the start of the new month but that’s okay -better late than never, right?

Here in New York, we’re having a pretty intense snow day. Schools are cancelled, work (for some) is too and everyone is pretty much cuddled up, watching Netflix, eating ice cream and drinking wine.

If you’re like me and have approximately 0 baes then this day can/might be a drag for you. I allllllmost found myself feeling kind of down about that. Then (as always), I snapped out of it and decided to use this day as a day of self-care and self love. So I thought it would be pretty cool to give you guys a little insight on how my day has panned out thus far.


My day started pretty early (around 8:30 am). As per usual, I woke up and checked social media (a bad habit, that must be stopped in 2017). Then I did a quick 15 minute yoga session before heading to the supermarket (with my mommy) to gather some things for my day/night in.

On the way to the supermarket, I decided that I would do a little home cooking -since I haven’t reallllllyyyy chef’ed it up in a while. (Btw, I love Bitmojis)

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After searching through a few recipes, I decided on a Vegan Alfredo Pasta and Salmon with a caramelized sauce. I threwwww down, okay!

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After relaxing and enjoying my meal  (and netflix) … I took a nap. Lol. Butttttt, when I woke up, I hopped in the shower, washed my hair .. got real sneaky clean. I lathered myself in some soft body butter (shameless plug coming up .. now – which is available at SKYBRITNEI) and I turned on some good music, lit some candles and meditated whilst repeating positive self affirmations.

Whenever I’m taking the time to just BE, my music choice is always Bob Marley, Lauryn Hill and India Arie (among a few other artists). As for the candles, I have really been into soy candles lately and I have been loving the scent of Lavender & Vanilla (mixed). These two combined, made it extremely easy for me to relax and enjoy the tranquility and stillness of my afternoon.

Winding down, I indulged in a bit of journaling via my #ANote2Self Meditation Journal by Alex Elle. I also read a few pages of my WordsOF Gratitude book.  These are just some things that help me center myself and gain some peace of mind.

After centering my thoughts and emotions .. here comes a little bit of the ratchet. I heard via Twitter that VH1 was replaying old episodes of Flavor of Love! And I had to indulge for a little while -I couldn’t help it lol.

Sidenote| Can we discuss WHY Trey Songz is doing a dating show? Why? Why? & Why? Lol.

Anyways – then, I thought to myself ‘people are always inquiring about my self love methods’ and without me realizing today was all about self love and being okay with solitude soooo, I decided to write this for you guys. A nice drink sitting next to me and Bob playing in the background .. now is where I’ll sign off to enjoy the rest of my night.

Keep in mind that self love is more than just what I do. It is different for each person. The only thing that should be transitional in self love is that it IS INDEED self love and is built on positivity.

Be well guys and always practice self love -everyday!

xoxo,
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Btw – as I was fixing up my site, I realized that I have over 2,000 followers. I don’t know when that happened but I am extremely grateful to all of you. I appreciate it more than you  know! Besitosss mis amores!

How To Get Your Life When You Feel Lost

I’m been away from my blogging safe haven for a while and during that time I had a breakdown, an epiphany, felt lost and confused .. and ultimately got back up and began to re-find myself.

I. Am. Still. Trying. To. Figure. It. Out.

Everyday is a challenge.

No, seriously.

A multitude of things has happened during my time away from my blogging safe haven. I am finishing up the final touches of redecorating my room. My heart was broken. I booked a vacation rental to Costa Rica for my 23rd birthday. My heart was broken again lol. I lost my voice. I stopped writing. I began to feel very uninspired. I re-found my voice. I wrote. A lot. I realigned my goals. My laptop broke – which ultimately stopped me from blogging to you all about all the things that I’ve been dealing with. I got a new laptop. I started to revisit the world of dating -yass honey! I started my natural body butters. I’ve been learning and experimenting with new jewelry designs and finding ways to better myself and my craft. I tried being vegan for a week. I realized that I can only be vegan for a week and the pescatarian lifestyle is for me lol. I also realized that my working environment isn’t one that makes me happy. Realized that a part of the reason that it is so hard to steadily be happy and journey on towards peace is because I am surrounded by more negative things, people and places than I thought. I realized that I need to separate myself from those things now more than ever for the sake of my mental health, clarity and continuous path to self love. Oh, I need a new job guys. This is FACTS. I’m actively looking. However, I also realized that my true goal is to work for myself. Aside from that, I also had to remind myself that even during my times of doubt and frustration that I am an extraordinary, exceptional, brilliant and beautiful human being. So for the time I was away ….. I laughed, I cried, I learned … and realized that I am a confused, beautiful but … seriously a confused mess and I need to get my life.

Yes, you read that long ass paragraph only for it to end with “I’m confused”. I am lost in translation. Swept up in thoughts of how to make myself a better person than I was yesterday and caught between making those around me happy, helping out where I can and perfecting my craft and writing and re-finding my voice and just wanting some plain old love and attention!

If the title has compelled you to read this then you’re probably waiting for the part where I give a list of proper advice about how to get ya life! Listen, this is one time where I am just as lost as you. No proper advice over here just the beginning phases of life getting that I went through, lol.


During my time away I learned that the best way to start is to identify the problem. The source of stress. Source of sadness, hindrance, confusion etc. For me, that was identifying that I felt stuck, stagnant and complacent.

Then I stopped in my tracks and thought about why I felt this way. I’ve been out of college for over a year now. I don’t have a job in my field. I gave up a year of my life to help out someone who doesn’t seem to appreciate it. My business has been open for a year and I feel like it should be bigger than it is (while I do know these things take patience, time, hard work and dedication). A relationship that I thought was going to flourish in every sense of the word … failed. I couldn’t hold on to money. Felt like important people in my life weren’t matching the effort in which I give them (this still holds true but this is for another post lol). Oh man, and so much more.

I cried. Then I cried some more. I let out a rage of emotions.

Then I snapped out of it.

If you are a frequent reader of my blog, it won’t surprise you that I then made a list.

I made a list of goals. Then I prioritized them. Then I made a list of how to accomplish them. I made a list of my feelings. Then I made a list of how to work through each one.

I consoled myself. Because at 2 a.m when you feel like the world is crashing down on you and there’s no one you can call .. you’re all you have. And even when you feel like you deserve more than that or you don’t feel like that’s not enough … YOU HAVE TO BE ENOUGH FOR YOU. No matter what.

I revisited yoga and different breathing practices. Because during this time, I stopped and I could feel the tension rising within me.

I prayed. I’m not religious in any sense of the word but I believe in a higher power and I find solace in talking to that being.

I woke up one morning and I decided that I could no longer let my feelings of complacency stop me from being motivated and taking charge of my life.

I woke up that same morning grateful that I have been given another chance to make things right & to be my best self.

I applied to jobs. I read a little. Put on a face mask. Laughed. Facetimed bae and told myself that the following days would be different.

I spoke my goals into existence and I have been doing it since that morning.

Then I smiled because the only place to go from here is up. There will be a few more bad patches along the way -I know. There will be more times, when I’m feeling less grateful and less blissful, more discouraged, more frustrated but I know that I will overcome it. As I stated before, I am an extraordinary, beautiful, intelligent, confused mess and I realized if it wasn’t so, I wouldn’t be me and I couldn’t and wouldn’t have it any other way.

& CHECK .. there you have it, in the midst of all things confusing, ya girl has begun to get her life.

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